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Winning the Trust
Excerpts from Man to Man: A Journal of Discovery for the Conscious Man—The Men's Teachings of Yogi Bhajan
"You may be very well-dressed, well-mannered, well-positioned, well-equipped, well in everything, but if you do not win trust, you have not arrived. There is no point in corresponding, in traveling miles and miles, in hugging, kissing and all that, when you have not reached the other person at all. When you start out, look good, look in your mirror, look in your consciousness, look in your intelligence, look at yourself—body, mind, and soul—and ask one question: "Can I win the trust?" Then, after winning the trust, can you keep it?
"I never react to anybody, because all of you have given your trust to me and I have to keep it. There's one more thing you have to do: You must give it back. You must deliver it. When you were born, it was called delivery. Trust is no good if you can't keep it. Keeping it is no good if you can't deliver. Why should you win the trust to begin with? For success! There is no success without it. We are not here to learn to be failures. We are here to learn to be successful.
"To create success as a human being, you must know how you talk, why you talk, when you talk, and what you talk. You must know what you are conveying. You believe that you can say things and get away with it. If you are angry, you want to talk angrily. If you are unhappy, you want to communicate your unhappiness. If you are freaked out, you want to create your freak out. If you are lovey-dovey, you want to communicate that. Actually, all you're doing is communicating your mood. You are not communicating yourself. It is simple to communicate yourself, just say, "I love you, but I am angry. I am not in a position to tell you why at this time, but I'll talk to you later." At least in this way, you protect your personality, and you don't communicate your anger. The result of this kind of communication is that the other person will always trust you.
"I am asking those of you who live by the emotional self, where are you going? The credibility within you is your credibility as a man. What you want on the Earth, what you want as a man, is to be recognized as a man. Understand that. The purpose behind all the wealth you are using, all the status you are using, all the emotions you are using, all the commotions you are using is that you want to be recognized as a man. Basically, if people don't trust you, it doesn't matter who you are, you have no value and no influence. As a male you have to understand that you will only be recognized as a man if you are trusted. If you don't gain the trust of the people to whom you relate, it doesn't matter who you are, or what you possess, or what you think you can influence, you have nothing to commend you as a man. So how can you be trusted? Your word must be everlasting. For your word to be final, you must be in touch with your intuition. Your virtue is in your intuition, not in your emotion.
"Keep the trust. That is what I mean when I say, "Keep up." Keep up means keep the trust flowing, keep the trust going, keep the trust living, keep the trust accelerating. Keep the trust in the memory of the other person forever and ever. Then, ultimately, you'll become God. I'll give you the secret of how to become God. When you are called in the name of trust by another person, and you come through and you deliver it, you are the God. When God is called upon in the name of justice and truth, God delivers it. Simple.
You are the men of God. May you recognize it.
You are the men of the Universe. May you deal with it in the light of God.
You are men to be men. May you feel the pride of it and be in grace.
You are the men of success. May you accomplish it.
You are the men of self, light, and respect. May you understand it.
You are the men of merits. May your virtues be known.
You are the men of knowledge. May your compassion be known.
You are the men of absolute determination. May your kindness be known.
May you be men whom the world, the Earth, the Universe may be proud of.