Love is Dangerous—Are You Ready for the Challenge?
By Pritpal Kaur Khalsa
It was 1970 and the air was full of freedom. Passion ruled and feeling into the moment was our mantra. My husband, Pritpal Singh and I were students at a small experimental college, both studying art. Long, flowing skirts and wavy, long hair were my uniform. The fever of hippie life was everywhere.
One night as I was rehearsing for a dance performance in a big warehouse space, I saw a very attractive man on the other end of the room engaged with every fiber of his being in creating a very big sculpture. The intensity of his eyes and his focus drew me to him. I quietly walked over to see this man with beautiful blue eyes and long auburn hair silently engaged in creating his work of art. It was a moment of attraction and a moment of deep knowing. Something inside me said yes.
Yogi Bhajan would call this a scent, a pituitary beaming. All I knew at this moment was I was drawn, body, mind, spirit to this being. We were young; I was 21 and Pritpal Singh was 20. Many of our early days together were spent creating art pieces and magic. Pritpal Singh was a photographer and I loved movement and dance. So many afternoons we took off somewhere to photograph me crawling through large cylindrical pipes in crazy postures or creating instruments out of found objects. It was the 70’s and experimentation was our life.
We were in the magical first stages of love—attraction and infatuation. We were blind and our sensory experience was our guide. What we did not realize is that in order to build a relationship that would last forever, we had to move beyond this stage. We had to face what was deep inside—our fears, our challenges, and the reality of our being. Our commitment was, at this point, just day-to-day living. Our decisions were based only in the present.
About one year after we met we began practicing Kundalini Yoga. What an amazing experience that was. After every class we laughed for hours and went to our favorite Macrobiotic diner to have a great meal. Our relationship was deepening. Then in 1972 we attended our first Summer Solstice in Mendocino, California. Soon after that we moved into our first ashram. The head of the ashram said that in order to live there we would have to practice celibacy until we were married. That was a moment of truth for both of us. Would we stay or would we leave? We knew that in order for our relationship to grow roots that would last for eternity, we must say yes to commiting to nurturing the flower of our spiritual lifestyle and practice.
We made the best decision we could ever make for our relationship and our future. For it is in this next stage of relationship that the danger of love really shows its face. It is a stage of courtship in which your ego is challenged and your fears and doubts arise. But we had the gift of a strong spiritual practice, which included 2½ hours every day in a strong group sadhana as the foundation of our life. And yes, all those fears and ego challenges showed their colors. It felt at times like dangerous waters to navigate. With the help of our teacher, our Beloved Yogi Bhajan, the Shabd Guru as our captain, a Sangat as our crew to stand with us, and Kundalini Yoga as our navigation tool, we made it through the rough waters to the next shore.
What awaited us on this shore was the next stage of relationship: commitment. This stage of relationship is the one that will last forever. We knew this and it took us a few years to say “yes.” It was clear that it would require even more courage to walk as two bodies and one soul. As we stood in front of Yogi Bhajan to ask for his blessing in marriage, he said, “Of course. You two look just alike.” We knew he was reading our auras and he then proceeded to give us the same spiritual names, Pritpal Singh and Pritpal Kaur. Our destiny was written, to look after and care for all with love.
A few months later, Yogi Bhajan sent us to London. Later, when he came to visit the ashram in London in the summer of 1972, he requested that we get married within two weeks after he arrived. With the grace of Yogi Bhajan as the Minister at our wedding, we have now been married for 38 years and we are still finding joy and bliss. Each day also brings challenges. When we remember that commitment means giving your head and heart to one another, even with the challenge to “Keep Up,” it is all great.
Do we sometimes want to say, “Wouldn’t this be easier if I walked away?” The answer is yes, but in the end, we know love is dangerous and meeting the danger and challenge is what gives us the gift of two bodies becoming one soul—one light. Smiling, we remember that is what our teacher saw when he gave us the same name and the same destiny and saw the unity of our auras.
Our advice to you lies in the words of this sacred shabad: “Once you give your hand to somebody in relationship, let your head roll off but let not your hand go.”
Pritpal Kaur Khalsa has been a teacher of Kundalini Yoga, Meditation and spiritual awareness for over 35 years. Her passion for assisting others on their road to excellence and fulfillment, and her wealth of experience as a teacher, healer and mentor bring a depth of joy and wisdom to her workshops, classes and coaching practice. Pritpal incorporates her vast knowledge of Yogic and Meditative techniques and a deep understanding of spirituality and a healthy lifestyle into her work with individuals and groups. She is a Personal and Professional Coach, a Sat Nam Rasayan Yogic Healer, Pilates Instructor and a KRI-certified Senior Teacher Trainer of Kundalini Yoga. For further information: www.pritpalkaur.com